Nov 2018 11

Instagram @henrysperson

Nov 2018 10

 

Hours away from hosting a large 90th Birthday party for my Dad and just remembered…

 

I don’t like people.

This could be a problem.

 

– updates as they come –

Nov 2018 08

 

Was just with my dog, Henry, on the TTC and an ‘interesting’ woman shared the key to his longevity…

“Canned tuna. With lots of Soy Sauce.”

Also, he would be reincarnated and come back as a Doctor.

 

 

 

Nov 2018 07

 

I’ve been in one of my moods the last few days. You know the one. You might have it once in awhile too – it’s the one where I just want to punch everyone in the face.

So naturally, it was a good day to work with children.

My day was spent in a recording studio making radio commercials starring young kids. My job? To direct them and convey the mood I’m looking for when they read the script. It’s tough enough with adult actors sometimes, forget kids. I’m dealing with my clients who have something in mind, my own ideas about how it should sound as the writer, and then trying to get the performance from the actors. And kid actors are the toughest.

First of all, you never know if they can act, and also – I have to remember they have their own lives that might affect their mood on the day. They’re kids! Maybe they had a fight with their parents on the way in. Maybe they’re hungry. Maybe they have to pee. You just never know. Also, I have to meet their parents and make sure they know I’m not taking them in the back to see my Llama petting zoo like Michael Jackson. It’s a lot to juggle when I want to just rage.

And the strangest thing happened. No, I didn’t punch any of them in the face.

These kids put me in a better mood.

They’re so full of optimism at this age (7 – 10) and like to laugh. I felt like I was a kid again, too.

I told one kid who wasn’t quite getting it that acting was basically lying and I needed him to lie to me more convincingly. “Make me believe you really want this for Christmas. Pretend I’m a rich Aunt or something and you’re trying to get me to buy this for you. You’re gonna have to really manipulate me better to make me empty my wallet, man.”

He said “I really do have a rich Grandfather that I do this to. Okay.’, and he nailed it next take.

One young actor decided she was going to start teasing me. I get this a lot. They’re my favourite kids. Maybe I’m basically just a bearded kid to them. I had to leave her in the recording booth between takes and I said “I’ll be back in a minute”. The microphone is always on, and while I was gone I heard her counting out loud. When I returned, she had her stopwatch on her Fitbit (!) going, “You were longer than a minute. You were TWO minutes and twenty two seconds. Lies!” So I said to her “Next time I’m going to leave you some sharp knives to play with between takes. Whaddya think of that?”. Inappropriate maybe, but we giggled our asses off together at the absurdity of this, and every take after was gold from her.

Another kid, pointing at my arm – ‘Is that a real tattoo or a temporary one?’
Me – “Temporary”
Kid – “Nah, that looks real.”
Me – ‘I got it two years ago. Maybe it’s temporary and I just haven’t had a bath in two years.’
Hysterical laughing together.

Anyhow, these kids just reminded me how fun it is to goof around, enjoy the day, and focus on the moment. They have their whole lives ahead of them and it’s nice to be around that kind of untainted potential, and their sense of wonder about everything.

And then tonight, a friend called and asked to come over. She works in the funeral services industry. She had to deal with a deceased child, and their family. She was really shaken up. What do you say? How do you console a family going through this? How do you help them move on? I don’t know. Compared to this, I don’t have a job. I spent the day with kids and we just enjoyed being alive. I can’t believe they even pay me.

[sigh] Truthfully, I still kind of want to punch life in the face.

It’ll pass. But I suppose I have to keep it in perspective and remember I’m just a kid with a beard. And you are too. Maybe not the beard part, but there really is a place inside all of us that hopefully, if we’re lucky, we can tap into and remember not to take it all too seriously.

We can help each other laugh through it all.

Thanks kids.

And for god’s sake just tell us when you have to go pee. It’s totally cool.

 

 

 

Nov 2018 06

 

Canadians: ‘Russia meddling in America’s elections is just plain wrong! Countries should stay out of other country’s affairs!’

 
Also Canadians: ‘Vote today, America! Do the right thing! Make us proud and vote blue!’

 

 

Sure I’ll get raked over the coals on the Canadian Hibachi for that one. But really, Canada. Come on. For a country of people that claim they want nothing to do with America now, and all the ‘Don’t buy American milk! Support Canada!’ talk, you sure like to voice your opinion about what’s going on south of the border today.

Look, do I like what’s going on in the States or other parts of the world? No. But posting about it on Facebook isn’t gonna do squat. Put your passion into what’s going on in your city, Provincially, or across the street even.

Let’s fix ourselves first. Mind what’s on your own plate.

Enjoy your Subway sandwich for lunch and the latest ‘Big Bang Theory’ episode.

 

Fine. Feeling surly.