May 2020 15



File under E for ‘Elon Musk might be right – this could be a Simulation’.

So one Saturday morning a few years ago while playing a Herb Alpert record, I say out loud “Herb Alpert is the shit. We really should get some more Herb Alpert records.”

And with that I take Henry for a dog walk in Parkdale.

We pass a smattering of records haphazardly stacked on the sidewalk.

There are a half dozen Herb Alpert records in it.

Reader, I recount this story not just to pay homage to the genius of the man with the trumpet, but also to remind you that life makes no fucking sense.

Anything can happen. Stay positive. And believe in your ability to manifest a stack of used records.



May 2020 14

The underappreciated Ivy. _#Parkdale

Instagram @henrysperson



May 2020 14



Did I go to swimming lessons as a kid? Karate? Piano?

No. We were poor. I went to the damn Batcave.

My introduction to Theatre of the Mind included ‘When Batman Became a Coward!’ featuring the Caped Crusader going into Psychotherapy. Heady stuff.

I played the batshit out of this one.





May 2020 13

Thank you, friend, for the letter. _#CanadaPost #Parkdale #snailmail #TheCovid #isolation2020

Instagram @henrysperson



May 2020 13


It was the late 1990s and I was a junkie in need of an intervention.

Filling my veins with Electronic Dance Music and hanging with people who were doing way too much Moby, I needed help but didn’t know it.

And then salvation came. Eleven tracks that jarred me into a moment of clarity like doing a line with strangers off the top of a toilet in a New York City Bus Station Restroom.

I remembered who I was – a gritty dirty-under-the-nails dive bar electric guitar-loving garage rocker. Addict.

Ubiquitous now? Absolutely. But ‘Is This It’ by The Strokes was a panacea.


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