Nov 2017 17

I think I’m hungry. Some observations while riding the TTC last night.

As I watched this teenage girl chew with her mouth open on the subway last evening, I’d never wanted a McDonald’s Filet O’ Fish so badly.

Her bad manners exposed her braces as she chewed, and the McDonald’s tartar sauce coated the tracks on her teeth. Which sounds gross, but she looked happier than I can ever remember being in my teens when music of The Smiths filled my head with loner tendencies and brooding.

Her and a girlfriend were sitting next to me on a crowded eastbound train around 7pm. Maybe about 13 years old and both of them were happily chomping on some McDonald’s they’d picked up. It was nice to see kids hanging out and having fun with each other rather than with headphones on, or their heads down on their phones playing a game – as is the standard it seems these days, even with adults.

By the way, I think the Filet O’ Fish sandwich is a very underrated item at McDonald’s. I order it a lot. I usually hold the tartar sauce and go over to the ketchup pump, open up the top bun and give it one good plop on there – sort of like how a I like my fish n chips.

Years ago I worked on McDonald’s in Canadian advertising and they said everyone has three items they rotate through. Usually you have one favourite and then two items that you cycle through when you’re switching things up. I think my 3 are: Cheeseburger (I can eat them like sushi), the Big Mac, and Filet O’ Fish bringing up the rear which I get a lot of heat for from friends who just don’t get the fish sandwich thing. Anyhow, it was nice to see someone appreciate the menu item as well despite the bad chewing habits.

Her friend was eating an interesting McDonald’s hack – a cheeseburger with two middle buns from a Big Mac on the outside instead of the usual bun.

After she finished, and was licking the ketchup off her fingers, she turned to the Filet O’ Fish girl.

“Oh man, you eat so slow.”

“What? (braces exposing the carnage like in ‘Jaws’) I’m just enjoying it.”

They bantered on about where they were going and who was going to be there, laughing. I wasn’t listening as much as I was just amazed at their optimism and energy. They were so engrossed in talking that they almost missed their stop, having to jump up and run out of the train as the door-closing chimes were ringing.

I didn’t just want their McDonald’s.

I wanted to be that age again.



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